I know we all can relate to a plain old, flat out, exhausting week. I’m going to touch a
bit on the whole theme thing for a minute because I swear, it seems like whenever
the crazies come, they come in droves. The most hilarious thing—that I just
realized at this very moment as I sit here typing—is that so many of my
infamous customer archetypes came to see me this week.
That’s why this post was such a long time coming—I had no
idea where to start. My first thought was gifts…because that’s always a fun
thing to talk about. Gift Events have the unique, wonderful ability of bringing
out the hag in haggle. It never fails that when the foreign bus coughs out
its load (no really, I’m not being jerk—there really is a foreign bus), the
topic of gifts always comes up.
That was my first clue that this was going to be a bad week.
I was bombarded by a family of five travelers from _____ (I
will let the experts out there fill in the blank) who insisted on receiving
five gifts from La Mer—plus five gift bags from the department. To be fair,
they were purchasing over a thousand dollars’ worth of product. However, I stood
fast and refused them—mainly because they threatened me with online ordering. I
do not deal well with threats. And seeing as I don’t work on commission and
this wasn’t my line, I didn’t need the
sale.
So I brought them down to a more realistic, more acceptable limit. Bully for me.
Yet low and behold, at the very moment I was putting their gifts
together, I caught sight of The Endlessly Annoying and Always Indecisive Woman—and
it was just my luck that she was waiting for me.
Trust me, I did not hold back the groan. I even cursed under
my breath—which happened to be loud enough for a coworker to hear.
Luckily, we were both on the same page.
And here’s where I’m forced to bite my tongue. She only took
up a half hour of my time (most of which was spent looking for a gift bag with decent
sewing on the inner lining…ugh). But she purchased from my line, AND I only had to try on three orange nail polish colors—just
three…mostly because I lied and said they were the only orange nail polishes in
the department (don’t you judge me).
All in all, I consider this to be a major victory.
Other visits this week included the Constant Returner, the Sample
Whore, and always, always the
Lipstick Lady (Bless her heart…she never really leaves, you know. I’m convinced
she has a secret home built under one of the clothing racks).
And last, but don’t you dare ever call her least, was the
Know-It-All.
Oh, I can see that hair coming a mile away—not to mention
the contouring. It was a blessed day for me as it was the day I chose to wear
my flats. There are some benefits to being S.A.H. (Short As Hell), when I’m in
flats I don’t have to bend over to hide from people. All I have to do is lean
forward a bit and poof! I’m gone.
So I spent a good fifteen minutes leaning forward and circling
the five foot wall of the counter I had to hide behind. I’m sure it was a great
moment for the LP people (the Eyes in the Sky), watching me move like a gerbil on
a wheel as I avoided making eye contact with this woman.
Do I feel bad that one of my good friends was forced to help
her?
Yes.
Would I do it again?
You bet your ass I would.
What? It was a really bad
week…
Cheers to you all! And happy shopping…
To BS: I didn’t forget, I promise;)
Tune in next time as I finally call out ‘The Energy Vampire’
and ‘Shopping with the Hubby’!
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